Set Your Phones On Vibrator.

What I love about Sprint’s Instinct “Romance” commercial, above, is its slick mashup quality, nakedly blendering dumb chickflick dialogue with a shameless cell phone pitch.

“Rachel, you know what your problem is,” the protagonist’s “biracial” BBFF urges over lunch (and faint, Ben Folds-ish piano chords). “You want everything: You want a husband, you want unlimited text, unlimited data, and unlimited calls.” Rachel gives an It’s-true-but-I’m-tired-of-you-telling-me-my-faults look in the other direction.

Then the climax: “Maybe you’re afraid to be in love!” the Best Black Friend summarizes, moments before Rachel’s breakthrough. “I think I’m falling in love…” she concedes, giving a girly headshake, “…with a phone!” Wow. What delicious crap.